Dating amongst millennials

We don’t know how to communicate

There isn’t much meaningful conversation amongst this generation considering most of the exchanged messages contain emoji and you gotta interpret it however best it will suit you and not necessarily the senders target especially in this age of over analyzing tiny details.

We hide behind keyboards

Take for instance a new couple, looking around you will notice they don’t time together but their online accounts show you the ‘relationship goals’ you’d wanna achieve someday. You will find the number of ‘I love yous in their online accounts exceed the number of times they have actually said it to the people they care about.

No spending time with each other

Yeah sure I know there are get together times like attending festivals which is once in like a year nevertheless during those moments a few percentage of the group would be doing any quality activity together as most of the group will be taking selfies to post for their virtual friends while others will be texting ‘friends’ they’d never meet.

We need honesty

As technology advances the more dishonest we get from lying about our locations, filtering our images to the most pleasing contrast, adding perfect backgrounds and lying to different people at ago.

Everyone is talking/f*ng /dating someone else

Not that am against dating more than a single person I actually think it’s good in a way (topic for another day) but at least let your partner know lest you risk harming yourself or others through diseases, suicides or even physical harms. In this generation, most of us are juggling conversations between partners, sending a single picture to all of them and working hard to keep the other relationship or however we tag it hidden that we end up not enjoying a single one of them

Replacements is one swipe/click/like/follow/add away.

Ever been told “I need space” only to find your ex-partner the next minute filling his/her account with the new catch? Yeah, that’s just how fast replacements is. Finding the next partner just involves turning on your phone and this increases the chances of cheating I mean different flavors are just a click away so why not?!

      Drake said:

We live in a generation of not being in love,

 And not being together

But we sure make it feel like we’re together

Because we are scared to see each other with somebody else

                                                                                                                                -Lopode

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Do not follow your ‘potential lover’ online

You just met him/her in the streets, at the bar, at the park or any other place the Lord has set to be in your the-first-time-I-saw-you stories. You exchanged numbers and now you have been talking for a minute and you manage to find out their full names. Darling do not allow the devil to tempt you into looking up their name on social media, but let’s say you are do not follow them and I repeat just DON’T. This is why:

Instead of waiting for a call you will be waiting for a follow back on Instagram or worst a friend request on Facebook. This will suck your energy, all of it, your esteem will be played with as you will keep checking if your posts are date worthy or if your photos look good enough. Honey take it slow, you already exchanged numbers don’t freak each other out too soon.

Sometimes or most of the times after following them you won’t stop there, you end up stalking them till you find out who their high school biology teacher’s name was or worse you start doubting your ‘almost boyfriend’ by over analyzing their photos. Who is she? Why is he holding her like that? Is she his sister? That’s Malindi, I thought he said his sister lived in Nakuru? Before even going for the first date you are already doubting him and having all the wrong adjectives to describe him. If that’s not bad enough you go on the first date already knowing his best quotes, dream place to visit and his favorite meal I mean what will y’all even be talking about when you already know so much about each other?

Lastly you don’t wanna plan your future, give up evening classes or some part-time hobby to struggle being with someone based on how stable he/she looks via the digital powers. Photoshop and filters exist dear.

 

Learn to know people at their own time and pace and let them know you at yours too.

 

                                       “ I don’t wanna be your friend on Facebook

                              in case it doesn’t work out I never wanna see you again

                                               especially not on my timeline.”

  

                         Love

                                     -Lopode

 

 

 

Almost relationships suck

 I was just beginning to know him, we had lunch once (just junk though) and it was amazing. I felt totally connected to him, you know, ‘the chemistry’, ‘when you know you know’, ‘the sparks’ all that kinda stuff that goes on when the heart overpowers the mind but then the worst happened, out of nowhere he stopped picking up my calls, he stopped replying my messages although I could see the blue ticks (still weighing the importance of this). He just vanished into thin air. kalash, kaboom, I really don’t know the sound to describe how people you care about just disappear.

Dear ex, (oh you are an ex to me, not really an ex-boyfriend but just ex something) your departure hurt so much, it left me with so many questions. Did I eat too loudly? did I do something? is my accent horrible? did you lie about being single? do you still think about me?

I remember the first time you said you loved me, I didn’t reply right away because I had to figure out exactly where we were and when I finally revealed how I felt to you, for me you truly meant something to me and I wanted us to stay that way just to be disappointed knowing I didn’t really mean that much to you.

Funny how we had followed each other online and had synced our activities expecting to experience so much together. Now every time I see you on my timeline it hurts a little more and I know I should unfollow you already but that’s all am left to hold onto and unfollowing you will mean I completely give up on you which won’t be happening anytime soon.

My pride won’t let me text you anymore but whenever you text me I will Surely respond. 

I miss you ex-something.

                                                                                          Your almost girlfriend 

                                                                                                                      -Kacela Lopode